All in Personal
"love with no body"
And yet, at the same time, wanting it didn’t involve my body. No physical desire to speak of. It was never a necessary component. I just wanted to be close.
Leaving Manhood
However, since I lacked the language to explain my desires, I felt shame for not having those experiences. Because having sexual and romantic relationships proves one’s masculinity to others, I never felt accomplished as a person.
Untitled
“I’m going to count backwards from ten …”
I drift into a trance before she hits the count of 1.
You Need To Talk To Yourself
Since coming out as asexual, I’ve learned a lot more about what my kink means to me, and what it doesn’t. While there’s no doubt that I seek out tickling when I’m turned on, it’s not a turn on in itself.
And
I get to choose whether I want something to happen, how much, when, who is doing it, and, most importantly, I get to choose when to stop.
Aro-Ace Desire
There’s also the issues of fucked up desirability politics and racism. I enjoy fetishes, but to be fetishized is to be dehumanized.
We Are Whole
Thanks to discovering asexuality, I see “no” as whole because we are whole.
asexual education is important because:
I didn’t know there was a word for people like me, so I never looked for one.
Thanks for the Invalidation
Where my identity as an asexual is seen as a choice hastily made, as if I only need a little persuasion, as if I just one day decided to stop being sexually attracted to others.
On Running and Asexual Embodiment
Before I could name it, I felt my asexuality as truly as my feet felt every step of a run. I now claim it as fully as I claim my body.
Seven of Wands
This card is my life. I am always engaged in combat.
Finding Identity
But for now, I’m holding on. Because there’s nothing wrong with me. And there never was.
A
And there is a label for people like me: asexuality. But how do I condense myself into the ‘a’ in ‘asexuality’? That ‘a’ means ‘not.’ That ‘a’ means ‘lacking.’
The Tightrope
Coming to terms with being aromantic asexual offered an opportunity to pursue what I wanted for myself. To reject the premise that my existence is centered on my appeal to men.
TOUCH
To have every cuddle, every kiss, every hug, just be seen as a path to sex - I didn’t want that.
Figuring it Out
You think everyone’s just faking it because that’s what’s cool, but you still don’t get why it’s cool.
Bitters
We market bitterness as a marker of adulthood (…) Set aside such childish things as sweetness and grow up.
Once Upon A Time
Once upon a time, the girl met another asexual. “Holy shit,” she said, “This has never happened to me before. It’s like meeting a unicorn!”
Since My Experiences Do Not Fit In Your Boxes
I can organize my relationships by asking myself how emotionally close and how interdependent I would like to be with a person.