Romanticizing Asexual Identities: Deconstructing Aromance while indulging-in versus refuting sex encounters through Art and Yoga
Romanticizing Asexual Identities - Deconstructing Aromance while indulging-in versus refuting sex encounters through Art and Yoga - A 'Shadow Love' Narrative on Essentializing Queerness for Inner Asexuality
Abstract: Asexual identity is a construct of social positioning of the act of intimacy and intercourse as sinful, innate to evolution and of instinctual behaviour linked to primal origins, or based on an abusive past encounter of the body by assaultive gender roles. It could also be due to a lack of arousal, low libido or other hormonal deficits due to emotional or mental wellbeing being affected. In identifying oneself within the varied definitions of asexuality, an ethnographic narrative of the self in context to the process towards becoming asexual is foretold. The enlived experience in a social setting examines the deromanticized elements of sexualizing unbelongingness beyond the spectrum of sexual preferences, into an esoteric form of an unaroused bodily acceptance. States of eternal bliss ("nirvana" in Sanskrit) have been attained through celibacy with conscious detachment from intimate and sexual encounters.
Degendering identities via mystic folklore offers an enlived divine experience of transitioning to a genderless form of bodily existence. In historical narratives such opportunities of redefining gender, orientation and preference offer present-day explorers to manifest ancestral categorizations of questionable gender roles and out-of-gender identities and preferences such as pansexuality, transexuality, bisexuality and asexuality.
This essay entails a reflection on the romantic aspects of identifying with asexuality for individuals who pan a spectrum of behavioural traits amidst acceptance and rejection of gender identities and preferences. The author invites asexual readers to an inward acceptance of the non-dual nature of sexuality rather than a rejection of the binary gender predisposition, as may be in the case of trans identities as well.
In homosexual (specifically gay) dating apps, the term 'side' represents a relationship based on hugs, cuddles and smooches - that don't necessarily include oral foreplays like rimming, blowing and anal intercourse. In India, asexuality constitutes the transcendence from trans aspirations of manifesting the 'ardhanareshwari' within - a non-binary integration of both masculine and feminine within one's constructs of gender - to an ungendered being, void of sexual urge and desire. 'Side' reflects asexual tendencies that disable an individual from having any sexual encounters defined by the act of sex.
Body art, painting and sculpting, and Yoga are therapeutic for the soul to feel intimate with the body. Aural / Astral scans and imagery channelize body-positivity, while tattoos, ceramic model-making and sketching work well in embracing our body-types.
The write-up hopes to anchor souls seeking an identity relating to non-preference of sexuality with the self - in accepting the internal voids and aspirations, as opposed to making rejectionist judgments about the identities and preferences that they don't align with. It offers empathy in reconciling with the LGBTQ+ community on diversity beyond sexual preferences and identities, thus enabling preferential personalities to develop based upon choice as against fear or disapproval - beyond gender dichotomies.
In the author's experience, allowance towards transforming preferences and identities, roots the human desire in being authentic, even if for brief periods - to the identity and preference that they relate with at that moment in time. Transitioning sexual preferences and identities offers less of a pressure to live up to the expectations that a particular identity or preference demands. Identifying temporally with a construct across and beyond genders, offers an opportunity to be intimate with one's own feelings and desires. Transiting urges through one's phases in life is important in making diversity more flexible within communities that already feel insecure and wrongly judged. Creating room for morphing through the spectrum of sexual preferentials, and gendered as well as non-gendered identities - offers the community encouragement to figure one's shifts and cycles - avoiding role misidentification and failed delivery of expectations as per the traits and characteristics of predefined identities and preferences. The essay encourages us to question fixated opinions on expected responsibilities across and beyond gender roles, and sexual identities and preferences.
Word count: 625
Keywords: aromance and art, engendering through yoga, queer and asexual, shadow dating - a date with the inner self
Introduction
Asexual identity is a construct of social positioning of the act of intimacy and intercourse as sinful, innate to evolution and of instinctual behaviour linked to primal origins, or based on an abusive past encounter of the body by assaultive gender roles. It could also be due to a lack of arousal, low libido or other hormonal deficits due to emotional or mental wellbeing being affected. In identifying oneself within the varied definitions of asexuality, an ethnographic narrative of the self in context to the process towards becoming asexual is foretold. The enlived experience in a social setting examines the deromanticized elements of sexualizing unbelongingness beyond the spectrum of sexual preferences, into an esoteric form of an unaroused bodily acceptance. States of eternal bliss ("nirvana" in Sanskrit) have been attained through celibacy with conscious detachment from intimate and sexual encounters.
Degendering identities via mystic folklore offers an enlived divine experience of transitioning to a genderless form of bodily existence. In historical narratives such opportunities of redefining gender, orientation and preference offer present-day explorers to manifest ancestral categorizations of questionable gender roles and out-of-gender identities and preferences such as pansexuality, transexuality, bisexuality and asexuality.
The Sensual Asexual - unromantic relations with the body and form
Romanticized narrations of identifying with asexuality either lure the audience in the mystics of a celibate life-path, in finding solutions to high sex-drive, or in awe of how can an asexual being even exist without libido. While the poetics of dormancy during pubescence and the wisdom of being elevated in spirit, or not associating with an innate human urge are at play, the self romanticizes the unrelatedness with anatomy and of not being attracted to either of the sexes. 'Asexuality is spread out within the dimensions on lack of sexual attraction or interest on sexual behaviour, and on self-identification issues, or in combination of these.' (Hebbar, Y. R., et al., 2018)
The art-forms - sculptures and paintings - invoke an 'intellectual masturbation' that is sensual to the mind, rather than the heart of feelings. Subdued hormones and repressed cravings of sensuality are replaced with neurotic signals that excite pathways in the creative and design aspects of the brain. Thought-heavy inaction serves as adequate and similar to an intercourse, except that energy is preserved and the heart still skips that beat felt during ejaculation. The rush of blood is focused on the memory of visualizing a foreplay of colours, in the art on display, gaining access to the artist's mind rather than a lover's body heat and heart beat.
Reproduction in Biology and social ordains of partnership and conceiving transform into material manifestations in forms of art for a few, while others find themselves in platonic relationships and discussions that stimulate neurons. The act of sex perturbs many in their platonicized understandings and acceptance of themselves beyond procreation and the societal norms of kinship. Extra-familial communities that share similar beliefs, offer asexuals respite from judgments of the self-proclaimed heteronormative and sexual groups that fail to understand asexuality as a conceptual choice of the individual.
Drawn to Sufi literature, or traditional scriptures praising Gods and Goddesses, one gives-up courtship to appease the divine masculine or feminine. The master is one's beloved. The feet of divinity are one's abode. Life's purpose is steered towards attaining unity with heavenly majesty and beauty. The works of the Earth seem trivial in the face of religious romanticisation. Pursuits of setting-base at shrines, or in temple-lands are longed for by the lover. He or she escapes from the realities of the world, hoping to elope into the fantasies of the awaited ceremonious betrothal with an unattainable imagined symbolic form. Cultural appropriations of godly origin borrowed from mythology quench the celibal thirsts of divine desire. Narratives are reproduced as angsts of liberation from shackles of sensuality and sexual urge, as folklore and prose in an era overindulged in sexualized greeds.
Beyond Gender Binary - Accepting Non-duality within
Being caught in duality of gender stereotypes subjugates oneself to the laws of a normalizing society. Bridging these gender gaps and uniting such divides allows for 'unisex' as a fashion statement to represent and exhibit one's identity. The transgender folk are still limited in transitioning between the ascribed-at-birth versus cherished roles.
The hijra (eunuch/transvestite) consider themselves as 'devotees of the Mother Goddess Bahuchara Mata, their sacred powers are contingent upon their asexuality. In reality, however, many hijras are prostitutes. This sexual activity undermines their culturally valued sacred role.' (Nanda, S., 1986) Being available for masochistic to misogynist expression by male clients, makes eunuchs submit themselves to effeminate role play - to cater to a masculine ego. It takes a lifelong healing from trauma of objectified sexual misuse and reaching an ecstatic stage wherein they are considered celibate and closer to divine form.
The request here is for readers to sublimate this exploration of objectifying oneself and commodifying the act of sex for pleasure, to assert asexual desires without the need for traumatic experiences towards attaining asexualism. In the core of one's heart lies a wish-fulfilment that can be achieved by maintaining strong boundaries, rather than allowing boundaries to fracture and permeate into non-identity. Identity formation must be rooted in preserving one's chastity, rather than withdrawing from negative exposure to lost virginity. A few asexuals refrain from or aren't turned-on by sexual arousal, but a vast majority reach the peak of lack of desire only after going through repeated bodily molestations and fragmentation of the emotional self.
Moving ahead, gender reconstruction must happen in the essence of one's being. This reorienting of oneself with ungendered hindsight leads one to express in a gender-neutral sense via unbiased decisions that base any further judgments in interacting across the gender lens. Non-binary identification promotes equality and dissolves limitations attached to genderized normatives that are now questionable.
Mystical Folklore towards Redefining Gender Transformation
Eunuchs in India are revered for their powers to invite new births onto the Earth realm and mourn during deaths so as to liberate souls from worldly attachments. They are welcomed at Indian weddings to bless the couple with the potency to procreate and bear children. Before the mother gives birth, their presence is considered auspicious to the wellbeing of the family including the baby yet-to-be-born. With such rich cultural integration, they perform at temples to appease masculine Gods in celibacy, and protect the chastity of the divine feminine at other places of worship towards Goddesses. 'Hijras (phenotypic men who wear female clothing and ideally renounce sexual desire and practice by undergoing a sacrificial emasculation) are believed to be endowed with the power to confer fertility on newlyweds or newborn children.' (Chaudhry, S., 2010)
A teenage boy lost in sexual and gender identity, with nowhere to go - succumbs to a challenging invocation into a community of Transmen that obey the commands of their God-Mother, also a Transman of older age. They earn by bestowing blessings upon pedestrians, shop owners, at signal lights or in train compartments between stations. Their freight across terminals and through city limits and beyond - are rewarded when they pool the collective revenue and retire each day as a large family. Their nightlife is more brutal, awaiting desperate or drunk men on roads to take them to bed for that hour, they have built resilience to face such dearth in lifestyle and livelihoods. But their charm and charisma remains alive when they sing and dance at marriages, or in their private foster homes as sisters.
Struggles of Sexuality within - Voids versus Aspirations
Aces (asexual individuals) have collaborated in conferences such as The PanACEa Asexuality Asia Conference organised by Indian Aces and Humans Of Queer each year during the Asexuality Awareness Week. These platforms offer an opportunity towards insightful sharing of personal stories in becoming self-identified as an Ace.
Without such opportunities and the lack of access to affordable psychotherapy, social media offers far too little scope for self expression. With friends and relatives judging one's plight and isolating them from further interaction, aces are considered abnormal and psychotic to have identified themselves as void of sexual zeal. Societal expectations over their performance and role as a social and sensual being are crushed, leaving no hope but abandonment.
Effeminate gays and masculine lesbians struggle through societal expectations onto them. They are unable to even satisfy internal desires of being nurturing versus providing, being homemakers versus breadwinners, in a constant conflict with their inner being.
Whether a void of being torn apart across genders, or a feeling of bliss with a resolved state of consciousness about the conflicting gender identities of one's past - surgery and its avoidance, both act as refuge to one's transformative journeying amidst sexes and preferences.
Preferential Personalities of Choice or Fear-based Identities
Identifying oneself in the spectrum of LGBTQIA+ is a challenge in itself. It is a complex decision that evolved over time, taking into consideration multiple factors such as societal influence, rebel nature, identification with unique traits, not fitting in as well as choices that aren't yet clear or grounded.
'Self-identification as asexual is managed, both as a threat to the self-concept and a source of personal meaning. Although asexuality emerges as an orientation to sexuality that can be reconciled with the self, its invisibility or outright rejection in society constitute an on-going challenge.' (MacNeela, P., & Murphy, A., 2015)
Making it a conscious awareness to relate to a label or tag requires introspection and contemplation. The immense journeying to what the soul seeks as benefits of associating with an archetype results in anchored positive action. Currently, many react from a vulnerable state of mind and emotion, rather than a responsive and strong core of unshaken beliefs.
Interludes of Authentic Human Desire - towards a Religious seeking of Celibacy
While for some - being asexual is a permanent safe-zone, for others - it is a temporary phase in life where being solitary is celebrated. Pansexuals tend to shift between periods of high sex-drive and interludes of a desire to spend time with oneself. If platonic promises aren't attainable, withdrawal into a spiritual being automatically shifts one's need for human contact - to a hermit's life in solitude.
Inauthenticity of the self in relating to bodily touch stems from fears of abuse in childhood and teenage, societal norms reinforcing sex as sin, or mere witnessing of the 'rape of nature', the molestation of our Earth by human greed. An eco-centric approach to address incapacity to our bodily forms - serves potential in healing buried emotions and insecurities around facing the male ego, the masculine energy. Feminine discomfort of engaging with sexual intercourse is more dominant in effeminate men, and is almost absent in masochistic women. Swapped gender roles observed in gay or lesbian couples indicate the structures of sexual tension - still in place, dictating stereotypical roles in relations. Gender extends its dynamics even in asexual beings, similar to in trans beings - by questioning the relevance of assigned sexual expectations at birth, by the very society we are born into.
Asexuals are denied expression of their choice to remain chaste and celibate. The ideas of chastity and celibacy are only accepted by communities who revere divine intervention in human lifeforms - and are unable to celebrate such identities as a community of asexuals. The cultural aspirations of religiously offering one's sensuality to be void on an earthly plane - are almost impossible to attain, with traditional rituals at temples that invoke oneself closer to the divine in their 'purest' form of being. Resisting the act of masturbating, intercourse and intimacy are considered challenging for a human to submit to. Through meditation, yoga and other therapies that keep sexual energy low - monasteries are able to guide people into celibacy.
Two personal sharings of the author, during PanACEa 2021 are as follows. One embeds the author's experience in their asexual relation with a masseur - towards body-positivity and healthy aura, and the other entails the author's embracing of both genders within - manifesting the divine masculine balanced with the divine feminine in their own being.
Encounters with the Masculine selves upon visits with the Masseur
This piece is written based on reflections on the multiple engendered male-egos that we encounter as individuals - while visiting a spa for a massage, for example - or upon engaging with our intimate characteristics of maleness within, in other ways possible. Going to the gym for a workout, athletics and sports, or swimming - connect us to our bodies and hormonal desires governed by self-defined traits associated with gender dichotomies. Intimacy enables exploration of form and urge, beyond the act of sex - and in the case of men, channels blocked energies through creative engagement beyond masturbation. Yoga is another practice that allows such expression and attuning oneself to one's gender-forms.
'The sense of touch defines sensual pleasures that lead to engendered sexual feelings for a human form. As the sculptor envisions a shape, the image of the infatuated is imagined in the view of the lover.
The astral block of marble etches and chips off, as the hands of the cupid-struck soul, work their ways into embracing the curves of the beholder of beauty. Only then can the sculpture unite with the artisan, and such is the case with Tantra, the art of embodiment beyond the self.
This mutual amalgam of energy fields is only felt when the skin and body of the client merge with the hands and heat of the masseur.'
Goddesses in men: ungendered emasculation
This is a reflective piece on encountering gender constructs of divinity, when we engage in a spiritual or religious integration within ourselves based on reconfigured identities. Gender, through a cultural lens - can be reconstituted to expand from binary hetero-normatives to a neutral and balanced sense of non-dual being. A state where you can feel the feminine in being a boy assigned at birth, biologically - or the machoness in socio-physically becoming a woman at puberty - is the transformed gender-void self.
'While trans women invite divine spirits into their bodily form, to take over and fulfil their desire for the feminine within, the masculine is free from societal beliefs around patriarchy, and the unequal treatment across genders. He transforms into an 'Ardha-nareswari' (half-man half-woman), inviting her expression through his aura-physique. And so does she unite with her male-counterpart within the same body of life, essentiating oneness and de-genderize(d) elements of godly origins.'
Transitioning towards Asexual Inclusion and its multi-faceted Diversity - The honoured Aces
While this generation of youngsters of the West or of western influence may be on the lookout for experiences that legitimize and validate them in an identity category, the philosophical myths of eastern traditions offer solace in non-identification and a fluid gender conceptualized by sexuality that isn't fixed. Stages of life are reached where non-dual existence provides space for accepting a dynamic self as transient in identity formation and dissolution.
'Asexualities provides a critical revaluation of even the most radical queer theorizations of sexuality. Going beyond a call for acceptance of asexuality as a legitimate and valid sexual orientation, the authors offer a critical examination of many of the most fundamental ways in which we categorize and index sexualities, desires, bodies, and practices.' (Cerankowski, K. J., & Milks, M., 2014)
While online dating applications assert categorization under a list of identities, the essence of transcendence is lost in preconceived judgments on behavioural tendencies based upon identity. To allow room for true inclusion of diversity, notions and presumptions must be dropped while interacting with individuals and the community. Acknowledging multiple meanings associated with a single identity may invite more souls to identify themselves and find anchorage in a supportive and conducive environment.
Morphing beyond the Spectrum of Sexual Preferences - A Date with the Inner Shadow
Dating oneself, self-intimacy and arousal in one's own company, are challenging aspects of asexual lives. A shadow is that element within the self that is ignored, unaccepted and unacknowledged. It needs embracing so as to ground one's identity in foundational roots that seek clarity over chaos.
'Shadow Love', a term coined through the evolution of this essay - invites asexuals to aspire to return to the roots of the human race. An urge to be fulfilled by native traditions, to be in the company of aboriginal folk, and to practice non-technological simplicity. A break from gadgets, the internet and media - asexuality invites the individual to a platonic relation with Earth, one that is sustainable for the world. Asexuality merges with tribal relations, and makes possible - aids diverted to under-developed nations and less-privileged communities. Being identified as asexual stirs in one the potential for outreach and engagement, opportuning equality, diversity and inclusion as principles of love beyond sexual intimacy.
Working with one's shadow-self allows room for matured integration of external relations within one's life - equipping the self in dealing with dynamics of conflict and compromise. Especially for asexual beings, their expectations from their partner, and the expectations imposed onto them to fill the sexual void - creates rift, if not addressed through mutual aggreement.
'Shadow-love' dictates an intimacy with the self, of being able to live in one's own company, and yet to feel as a part of society. It invites the shadow-side of the self to spill over positively into lucrative offerings beyond sexual relations, and to unconditionally feel universally belonged to a sense of non-intimate relation with the world.
'Shadow-self' engages in refuting conditional biases in sexual relations, invitational to a non-sexual dialogue that relates one to the world within. Seeing through the microcosm, one inwardly reflects the happenings of the outer cosmos. 'Shadow Desire' entails such self-relational beliefs that situate a giver with abundance beyond the dynamics of expectations within a sexual relationship.
Relations chosen reflect our subconscious needs. Paying attention to the desires of the partner is of utmost importance in an asexual relationship. The lack of sexual chemistry may create opportunities to revive love by organising threesomes or watching pornography together. Deeper engagements could create design elements that spark the sensual urge in home-decor and lighting, in fabric and clothing etc.
'Shadow relations' are encounters that embrace the self in the voids of one's own processes of identifying with asexuality and living the very same identity on a daily basis. It is beyond the challenges of being pansexual or bisexual, and it is an unaddressed identity unlike trans, which has been included and represented after decades of internal figuring and outer reclaiming.
The shadow-self needs reclaiming and embracing. It is in a state of awareness amidst asexual individuals who've surpassed social norms, misjudgements and abuse. Asexuality has the potency to transcend shadow-love into an intimate relationship with oneself - in discovering the subconscious fears and discomforts within. Shadow-love creates mindful identities and preferences across the sexuality spectrum. It channelizes right identification with clarity and purpose - to help us be aware of our needs, and in-tune with our emotions.
Encounters with Asexuals on Queer Platforms - Dating the Shadow within
There exist multiple understandings of asexualities across a spectrum of undesired external embodiment, discomfort with one's own sexual body, and neutering one's cravings for essentializing sexualism as a personal identity.
In homosexual (specifically gay) dating apps, the term 'side' represents a relationship based on hugs, cuddles and smooches - that don't necessarily include oral foreplays like rimming, blowing and anal intercourse. In India, asexuality constitutes 'ardhanareshwari' (half-man half-woman) - a non-binary integration of both masculine and feminine within one's concept of gender, or the transition across gender - without sexual urge and desire. 'Side' reflects asexual tendencies that disable an individual from having any sexual encounters defined by the act of sex.
Other terminologies like 'top', 'bottom', and 'versatile' genderize and polarize sexuality. With preferences - male and female roles are assigned to dictate relational responsibilities. 'I don't swing' is a phrase used to denote the resistance by non-bisexuals to switch their sexual orientations between genders. But asexuals remain unacknowledged with an absence of terminologies that emphasize their identity. Gender non-conformists choose to neutralize their aura with unisex attires and transgressed fashion elements that question polarities by onlookers. Aces embody tattoo and body art to depict their rationale in identifying with non-sexual identities.
While piercings on earlobes, naval and nasal septums, nipples, eyebrows and lips - and wearing bracelets and necklaces - cut across notions of manhood in historic depictions of Indian rulers and their garments; bold statements of jewellery, and westernized 't-shirt - jean - jacket' combinations, accompanied by half hair-do's and lengthy side-fringes - dictate persona of non-sexual beings on profiles of applications used for a friendly chat or meet-up. Asexual dating is gaining prominence, but with a lack of clarity in what they truly want from a relationship - their built-identity remains misinterpreted and misrepresented.
Identifying as an asexual, even the author lacks such competence to clearly identify their own needs. From demi-god desires to sapiosexual cravings, one intellectualizes sexuality to a point where it transits to an asexual identity. The 'mind-fuck games' that we play with romanticizing unquenched desire translates to 'word-porn' that doesn't necessarily entail action-in-bed. And to fill the very same void amidst sheets of shared intimate moments, yet another literal vacuum is created to represent non-polar non-binary essence of living without that innate thirst for libido and sex-drive. A mental head-space of uncertainty looms over those who don't express or possess sexual desire. Inexpressive emotions stir within, conflicting with the normalcy of sexual craving. A lack of urge to get intimate numbs feelings of hope of togetherness beyond relations dictated by platonicity and a life in hermitage.
Finding solace with one's bruised relations with one's own body - in a crowd of homo-normative, homo-erotic and homo-phillic queer folk - is quite challenging to explain, when met with wrong judgments. Healing one's bodily form and expression goes a long way in reclaiming identity away from misjudgement and a self in unawareness.
Yoga as Therapeutic to Body Image and Queerness
The art of bodily stillness can be achieved through Yoga. Yogic practices entail stretching of muscles, breathing exercises and posture-corrective techniques that are followed alongside meditation on a ritualistic basis. Eating healthy and hydrating oneself, avoiding chemical intake etc. also comprise Yoga. The author invites readers who are conscious of body weight, appearance and characteristic traits of their genetic make-up - to meditate upon the shame or guilt - surpassing anger or fear towards embracing their body-type or gaining motivation to find fitness activities that suit their bodily metabolic needs.
'Dhyanam' as in consciousness comes from a still mind having full awareness of the possibilities of flow and flexibility that come from embracing one's body-form. There are many forms of Yoga and one can tune-in and create a form for their own needs.
Yoga helps balance the masculine and feminine within. It allows us to engage with gender neutrality, non-binary and genderless identities. Yoga helps assimilate and acknowledge our sense of queerness through an inward journey that helps embody who we are, what we aspire to be, and where we are already - in this journey of being and becoming.
Body Art and Nude Drawing as Therapeutic to Asexuality
Tattoos have for generations symbolized tribal anointment and cultural expression of personal and folk identity. Body painting, Greek sketches and sculptures have personified the curves and edges of body-types to sooth the artistic eye with aesthetics. Making oneself vulnerable to explore such forums of healing and engagement with the outer world - makes one confident in their skin and flesh.
Being naked to oneself is a challenge for the LGBTQ+ community, one must undergo raw acceptance of truths within - to steer ethical discourses on identity and preference. When one challenges one's core to question ascribed beliefs - we dissolve layers and masks of identity that don't serve us, and manifest true identity.
Embodying asexuality comes with a desire to transcribe the sexual urge to masterpieces of creative design and framing. Concepts such as astral / aural imaging, painting one's imagined self, and clay-modelling of body structure invite asexuals to an esoteric exploring of intimacy through art and body movement.
Loving like an Ace
It isn't just the seven colours
In a rainbow of identities
That needs to be visualized,
But the hues and contrasts
The tones of saturation
The shades and shadows,
Which form the spectrum
And are upheld - included
While the sun shines upon rain.
In this true celebration
Shall a community emerge
Uniting towards a cause,
To be seen, to be felt
To feel each other
To feel together,
To feel free
To breathe
To exist.
Poetry by author
Nudism in Yoga and Massage towards reclaiming a Healthy Sense to Body-Image
Indian massaging services traditionally include wearing merely a loin-cloth, and intensive touch-based healing techniques that revitalize skin, breathing, circulation, digestion and muscle-bone agility and mobility. The vulnerability of the client to be bare and receive therapeutic sessions with a stranger - connect one's core to the pursuit of repositioning one's comfort with one's curves and flabs. The intent of this hour-long repetitive service is to tune into the form and figure of one's essence of being. Even in yoga - meditating with a waist-cloth and flexing one's body through rituals of steps that channelize energy - allows for an acceptance of and challenging one's capacity, given the frame of body they own. An inner mirror, or the lack of one substituted by an external being whose moves are to be followed - springs the body into motivation and aspiration towards flexibility and activeness. But having a full-size screen to capture and record one's body movements - boosts confidence in the body frame type that they possess.
Layers of judgment are dropped, including self-limiting beliefs - in engaging with the design and framework of one's essence. Auras of body-positivity radiate when obesity and leanness are challenged by body-movement that was unthought of until now. Validating for oneself and for others, integrates healing from body-shaming with revived sensuality that boosts sexual aura in owning one's form and frame.
Folk-Dance Practices in rooting one's Sexuality and Body-Structure with a reunite with Nature - towards Gender Transition and Altered Sexuality
Grounding oneself with earthly beats of music, adorning in leafy fabric and choir robes - allows for a revival of lost sensualities. Rhythmic movements and body stances enable a fearless charisma to orchestrate in one's nerves and sinews. Rippling sounds and campfire ambience invigorate a return to the divine sense of being - where form dissolves into formlessness, weight lightens with sounds of nature, and the body feels liberated. Sensual and sexual energies are reclaimed with soaks in wet clay and salt-water baths or dips in fresh-water springs. Nature heals us from our past traumas, returning to natural ways that syncs us with our essence beyond human judgment of normative forms and formative norms - validates diversity in structure and sexualities.
Cultural performance as a process rather than a product offers insight to the transitional nature of one's sensual journeys. Fixating on given identities at birth limit one from a process-driven inquiry into the transforming stages of being and becoming, of desiring versus attaining. Physical as opposed to embodied changes are harder to achieve in a world of expensive surgeries and sutures. One can pay attention to the energy-dynamic of shifting one's gender and sexuality rather than insisting on physical alteration.
Staged theatre events and street plays invalidate physically and socially attributed gender typologies by shifting the focus on attire and aural vibes - reaffirming gender and sexuality to be beyond visible and objective traits verifiable by the scientific rationale. The socio-cultural and eco-personal elements of fluid gender and sexuality are emphasized through a deeper engagement with symbolisms of nature and culture in materializing them beyond the constructs of socio-physical proofs. Attributing gender and sexuality to ecological patterns and individual needs places subjectivity in handling a more culturally individualized meaning to sex and sensuality. This allows for a multiplicity in thematic purviews of genderized identity formations alongside a healthy sexual or asexual life.
Pornography in performance
A few asexuals have an innate craving to touch-base with body and form. They crave for artistic explorations that are void of the act of sex, of intimacy etc., but have a sensual appeal in creative expression of the human figure and physiology. Through nude artistry, nudist galleries of fine art and naked intimacies with one's own bodily framework, aces yearn for an outlet of sexual exposure and exhibiting one's intellectualization of nakedness, of sensuality.
Romanticizing the headspace of love, affection and intercourse - asexuality predefines intimacy without the sense of touch, to be mind-driven. The only available platforms beyond 'a disgust towards porn' entails an aesthetic representation of human skin and shape - in galleria, in stage-displays and scenes of narrative building performed via theatricals. Art therapy and theatre-based healing offer asexuals an opportunity to embody their sculpted-selves into an exhibit of sensuous attraction - filling any sexual voids within solitary moments lacking intimate encounters with another human.
'Performance-intimacy' thus invokes an exposed sensual self to be vulnerable to the critiques of onlookers who are stranger than and far more in number than the acquaintance we 'take to bed'. It allows for the subject to express authentically - their desire for a sexual appeal without an act of sensual intimacy.
Conclusion
The author invites readers to an inward acceptance of the non-dual nature of sexuality rather than a rejection of the binary gender predisposition, as may be in the case of trans identities as well. This essay entails a reflection on the romantic aspects of identifying with asexuality for individuals who pan a spectrum of behavioural traits and characteristics amidst acceptance and rejection of gender identities and preferences.
The write-up hopes to anchor souls seeking an identity relating to non-preference of sexuality with the self accepting the internal voids and aspirations, as opposed to making rejectionist judgments about the identities and preferences that they don't align with. It offers empathy in reconciling with the LGBTQ+ community on diversity beyond sexual preferences and identities, thus enabling preferential personalities to develop based upon choice as against fear or disapproval.
In the author's experience, allowance towards transforming preferences roots the human desire in being authentic, even if for brief periods - to the identity they relate with at that moment in time. Transitioning sexual identities and preferences offer less of a pressure to live up to the expectations that a particular identity and preference demands. Transiting urges through one's phases in life is important in making diversity more flexible within communities that already feel insecure and wrongly judged. Creating room for morphing through the spectrum of sexual identities and preferentials offers the community encouragement to figure one's shifts and cycles - avoiding role misidentification and failed delivery of expectations as per the traits of that identity or preference. The essay encourages us to question fixated opinions on expected responsibilities across and beyond gender roles, and sexual identities and preferences.
Bibliography
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